Me and Nick went and got booze. Hud’s worked.

Dropping off our first, Hudson, for his first year of university was bullshit. It was in the heart of Covid, so only a few people were allowed in the general areas of residence at once, including only one parent permitted to assist with move in. I waited in the car while Steph, brow furrowed over her designer mask, lugged up the boxes and bags to help Hud set up the best she could under really specific and sad circumstances. I said goodbye to Hud with a hug and a shrug, telling him to try and make the best of it. But there was no best of it. It sucked.

This past Friday, we dropped our youngest son Tasman off at residence in Nova Scotia to begin his first year. It was the polar opposite of his brother’s experience. The nervous energy hung in the air like a pink bubble gum bubble waiting to pop. New students holding random print outs and their student cards in front of them like compasses, talking to orange-shirted second and third years actively directing the first years find their new home away from home. Parents nodding at each other with pressed lips and a slight gloss of just before or just after crying in their eyes. It was incredible and while I was so excited helping load up Tasman’s stuff and obeying Steph’s orders where to put everything, it did make me feel sad for Hudson’s experience. For us this was a second time moving a kid into residence, but it’s a first time for them, and you never get first experiences back.  Cherish this I told Tasman, remember this day. He nodded and looked at me like I was crazy, checking out the girls moving into their own rooms.

Tasman’s been gone three days now. We are back home and I just completely cleaned his room. I did the same when Hud left. It’s cathartic for me to purposely get rid of constant reminders of them not being around anymore. They are my best friends and I miss them both, even though one is still around in snippets and other pretty much answers my texts right away. The title of the post was his first response when I asked him yesterday how he was doing. His brother’s ID proving to be very valuable for him and his mates.

Today when I asked the same, he responded: “I’m gunna find my classes then maybe swim in the ocean. Then eat dinner with the boys, play 4X4 ball, shower then sex toy bingo.”

I will likely not share this amazing response with Hud.